Not nearly enough….. I do not, nor have I said No nearly enough. Fact of my life.  I am now in a place where there is no option that makes sense but to say no. Too little to late? Maybe…

As a mom who has raised her kids through a life spent mostly alone, on my own. A woman who has dealt with disability, dysfunction, and abuse and still managed to keep moving, growing and evolving, I  suppose I have always managed to get back on track. Saying No, while it does not come easy for me, has become something I believe comes from a desire to live in truth and peace at this stage of life.

I always wanted to take care of everyone and everything myself. I still do but I know that it is time to strengthen my boundaries and just live life on my terms. Easier said than done… but a challenge who’s time has come. I feel an inner peace lately, a foreign feeling to be honest. I sat with it, have sat with it a while now, trying to understand where it comes from, is it normal. (As if anything in life is “normal” now.) I decided lately that it is a God thing, I know my heart, my needs, my desires… I know I am not alone ever truly, but the truth is I feel it. While being concerned about myself more so than anyone else is foreign to me, I suppose its time to settle into it, so saying No… it is my new thing. I’m just learning as I go, we all are if we are honest.