If… IF is a big mountain to look over, at times it is insurmountable. IF money didn’t matter and I could afford to be educated, what would I be? What could I be?
I would be a counselor IF I could have found an internship. I was told, and I believed that age and disability were no barrier, I could do and be. BUT then the world changed and shut down, and people became jaded and disconnected in a way we have never experienced.
IF I could be anything… it would be a journalist, a newspaper columnist. But that never happened so long ago for me, money was not there, and life took a turn too.
I would be a Shopkeeper, one that sold antiques and old books and have a coffee shop inside. But again, money was not there for the start, and life took a turn, and it was not doable.
I wish there had been chances to do some of the things I dreamed of I did not get to do, but in the end, I am happy for what I did do and see and experience. Money, they say does not bring happiness, I say it is not what happiness hinges on, but it does not hurt either. I have been blessed in my life to have what I needed, what I wanted and most of what I wished for… I have managed to always have a home, to provide for my kids and to help them as they have grown. I have not been evicted, gone hungry, or been destitute. As I say, I have been blessed. I have been a shopkeeper, just not in my own shop. I write and have been published in two anthologies and write her to share and feed my inner writer. I work part time and enjoy my customers, making people happy and smile is good. I am a counselor to many, even with no license. I help who I can, I have always teased I have a sign over my head that says “tell me all your troubles and I will hear you…” I find great oy in being told some days, “You are funny, you made me smile. I see God in you!”

So I suppose what I am saying today is, Money is not always something that holds you back, there are ways to get what you want, sometimes you have to just keep stepping, go on, and watch as God moves things and gives you chances to be and do in other ways the things that you hold in your heart ! Don’t Worry, look back, look forward, and know, God is in the details…